Delivery – ANC style
March 22, 2009 at 3:01 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: ANC, Corruption, Humour, Jacob Zuma, Politics and Government, South Africa
Commitment to Clean Government
ID candidate has a criminal record. What do they do? Take him of the list and lay criminal charges for fraud.
Maybe the ANC could take a leaf from this book. Instead the ANC:
• ANC promotes their criminals and incompetents.
• ANC defends and hero-worships their criminals. (Yengeni carried to jail as a hero, Mantashe spending a week defending Niehaus)
• Nominate VP “Kopdoek” Mbete despite her crimes
• Nominate Winnie
Cracking Down on Underperformers
ANC president Jacob Zuma on Saturday promised to clamp down on poor performing members of his party before leading several hundreds of his supporters in a festive song and dance jive in Langa, outside Cape Town.
So why don’t you fire them now
Want a list to start with?
• The other Zuma for the Zimbabwe fiasco
• Manto for killing thousands with her stupid aids policies
• Foot in Mouth Balfour for faux pas, too many to mention
• Radebe for ESKOM, bad roads and road deaths
• Xingwana for Landbank fiasco and spectacular land reform failure
• Mapisa-Nqakula for the spectacular disaster called home affairs
• Sonjica for ESKOM and the divestment from SA mining.
They fire the over-performers like Pikoli and promote the under-performers.
I guess someone has to teach Mr. Zuma what the criteria are. Performance to him is how well you:
- Steal
- Fornicate
- Commit Fraud
- Accept a bribe
- Pass the buck
- Lie and deceive
- Deny accountability
- Stay out of jail when charged
Baleke “Kopdoek” Mbete
I believe her love for headscarves comes from her days as a housemaid. Her madam was very fashion conscious and a bit of a snob. She taught Baleke the importance of looking smart even as a humble servant. Kopdoek remembered the fashion part but forgot the humble and serving part. She now believes in “Fuck the serving and humble shit, that is for leaders, I’m a politician and I’m here for the Power and the Money, travel and fun”. Rumour has it that she is planning to convert her office in the Union buildings into a regular den of fun. Is she planning to make “Whoopee” with Malume perhaps?
Anyway, Kopdoek said in her “Human Rights Day Speech” her hero, Jacob Zuma, would be found innocent.
I wonder what that means. She has warped sense of innocence. She does not consider the Travelgate Fraud a crime and buying false driving licenses are also legal if you are in a position of power
Mothlanthe Calls For Delivery
Old Petrus, Zuma and Mantashe’s favourite lapdog, said there was still no delivery in certain areas. We should ask why? I can think of a few reasons:
• Money going into the pockets of cronies and the ruling elite
• Money spent on illegal immigrants and refugees from Zimbabwe
• Poor quality in standards of houses and infrastructure
• SACP inciting Khutsong citizens to burn and destroy in the name of activism
• SACOS inciting school children and students to burn and destroy schools, books and equipment in the name of activism
• COSATU affiliates inciting their members to trash cities.
• The cost of ANC incited anarchy comes off money allocated for the poor
• Teachers, not teaching but being paid, costs money and means non-delivery, but are encouraged by ANC structures and partners. How many school hours were lost due to teachers participating in Zuma demonstrations?
WHOM DO WE THANK for non-delivery? THE ANC
ANC Election Manifesto
March 21, 2009 at 4:20 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: Africa Politics, ANC, Corruption, Humour, Politics and Government, South Africa
Safety and Security
In every election since 1999 the ANC have promised to reduce crime and violence. Before every election the rolled out the big guns, all of them big on populist rhetoric but short on real plans and actual delivery.
Examining the facts, we find that despite all the talk by ANC leaders, the facts point to a dismal situation and a prime example of ANC non-delivery. It points to gross mismanagement of funds, funds disappearing into pockets of leaders and officials nepotism and cronyism
The ANC will tell you that on their guard they have done the following:
Increased spending on safety and security from R 17 Billion Rand in 2000 to R 43.3 Billion Rand in 2008.
Manpower have increased from 100 000 to 140 000 in the period 2000 to 2008. Because of the increase in manpower South Africa now have a police to citizen ratio of 1:370. This is better than the pre-1994 and better than the international benchmark of 1:400. The racial mix in the police force is now 83%.
Murders have decreased.
We will do more and spend more to improve training and upgrade facilities, establish street committees, improve justice system, fight organized crime, reduce violent crime. (Same as in previous elections)
All South Africans are equally exposed to violent crime.
What the ANC does not say is:
In the same period (2000-2008), there has been a huge increase in private security spending. It is estimated that 300 000 private security guards were employed by private citizens and companies. The job of the government are now subsidised to an amount equal to the police budget.
Despite the increase in spending, we still hear daily about shortages of cars, fuel and equipment.
Although the manpower has increased, the ratio between uniformed policeman and detectives has increased and there is now a huge shortage of detectives to investigate crimes. The skill level of the policemen in service has dropped and so has the standard of policing. The quality and skills in the Forensics Department has dropped to an all time low. Administrative foul ups makes it impossible to secure drink and drive convictions. The lack of skills in forensics and the detective division is a direct result of AA which caused large numbers of highly skilled white staff to leave.
Loss of fire arms, dockets have reached crisis proportions and can only be attributed to corruption, incompetence and only
In a study by the Institute for Security Studies, it was shown that 1-in-ten coloured and black citizens were victims of crime whilst 2-in-10 white and Indian citizens were victims of crime.
Statistics and studies
Despite the ANC’s efforts in the past 14 years, statistics and studies show that they have been ineffective in their efforts. Some critical areas highlight the dismal failure of the governing party. In the period 2006 – 2007:
• People murdered, 19200
• People escaping murder attempt, 20300
• Robbery with aggravating circumstances, 126000
• Raped, 52600
• Murder rate SA 40.5/100 000 (UK 1.4, USA 5.6)
• In this period only Sudan and Burundi were more dangerous than South Africa
• Reported crime in 1994/1995 was 20 222 899. In 2006/2007 this number has increased to 21125 227. It has to be said that in 1994/5 there were some residual political violence. By 2006/7, people have largely stopped reporting petty crime.
Due to corruption and incompetence, less than 10 % of violent crimes end with a conviction. Of all crimes, committed 75% will never get to court.
Recently, this week in fact, it was discovered that the number of lost dockets have increased by 56% in three years. The backlog at the Forensic Department increased by 93% in the same period and 3700 firearms were lost in 2008. These are simple things to manage yet they cannot get it right.
Cause of the Crisis
Incompetence, due to lack of skills, resulting from AA and lack of training has been mentioned already. Add to that:
• Lack of leadership (Commissioner of Police suspended, Johannesburg Metro Police chief suspended, Ekhuruleni Police chief suspended, various other SAPS leaders suspended)
• Examples set by leadership (Aforementioned suspended police leaders as well as station commanders recently suspended for corruption, one for changing statements the other for selling dockets, a future president charged with corruption, a deputy president who bought a licence illegally, a cief whip defrauding the taxpayer, a convicted fraudster nominated for parliament, etc)
• Moral of the police at a low as highlighted by violent metro police strikes and gun wars between SAPS and JMPD.
The most serious problem however, are political leaders not giving the correct message and not acknowledging the extent of the crisis. Examples of this are the statement by Charles Ngakula that people who do not like crime must leave the country. Thabo Mbeki referring to a “perception of violence” and the latest gem by Jacob Zuma, who recently told Al Jazeera that, crime in South Africa is no worse than in other countries, our media just give it higher visibility.
The fact that the deeds of violent criminals are generally attributed to poverty does not help. Many poor countries, India, Ghana and many others, where poverty is as bad or worse than South Africa they do not have the same problem.
The ANC still does not address crime to the extent they should. They do not realise the extent of the crisis, they have not been able to manage all the contributory factors. All causes of crime should have been addressed, instead the ANC preferred to protect their cronies, indulged in populist rhetoric and denied the crisis.
The Way Forward
Get rid of the ANC. They have not made an impact in fourteen years why would they in the next five years.
Vote for a party that is committed to fighting crime.
Recognise and address all causes of violence and know that the cost of crime will cripple the country. The money the ANC waste on crime prevents delivery in other areas.
Open Letter To Tokyo
March 19, 2009 at 9:55 am | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: Africa Politics, ANC, Corruption, Humour, Jacob Zuma, Politics and Government
A dear friend wrote this letter to Tokyo but we think the NIA have sided with the Communists and are keeping it away from Tokyo. Paranoid bastards.
I undertook toplace it on my very widely read blog thus getting word to Tokyo.
If any reader of this posting knows anyone connected to Tokyo, please pass this on
The Chairman
Mvhelaphanda Group
P O Box 413420
Craighall
2024
South Africa
Dear Mr. Sexwale,
Business Opportunity – Traditional Healing and Health Service Delivery
You could have blown me over with the proverbial feather when I read about your views on witchdoctors and traditional beliefs. It is not that often that you find a freedom fighter, politician, captain of industry, entrepreneur, celebrity, film star who values the traditional. Great achievers, like you, often shun their simple but honest background and tradition, a sad trend indeed. The reverence in which you hold witchdoctors reminds a bit of another icon of Southern Africa traditionalists, Eugene Terreblanche and his unwavering believe in the great diviner, Siener van Rensburg.
Harnessing your entrepreneurial spirit, public persona and unwavering beliefs in witchdoctors and traditional healing, could of course, result in the establishment of a powerful African business empire. I am talking, about a mega integrated traditional healing business with its tentacles reaching out and touching all of Africa.
Can you imagine this, Dischem-like Muti-centres in the metropolitan areas, cities and bigger towns. Where you do not have enough feet, you can establish clinics and rooms where traditional healers, witchdoctors and diviners can set up offices and rooms. A total brand can be built around the concept with even the buildings fitting in with the traditional theme and designed in such a way that the customers will feel at home, probably based on the mud hut look. The total service can be extended to include administrative offices that can provide administrative services to the tenants of the clinics and witchdoctor practices. That, I am sure, appeals to your sense of public responsibility by bringing these people into the tax network. The idea can be extended to small towns and villages where you can sell franchises with the local witchdoctor the obvious franchisee.
In a country like ours where we need to supply jobs and again, with your knowledge of farming, we can set up farms where we can grow many of the herbs, plants and roots needed for the manufacture of Muti. You can even have farms where rhino and other animals can be bred for the body parts required in Muti manufacturing. The possibilities are endless. I am sure with the right justification and the power the ANC has in parliament it will be possible to amend the laws to enable the harvesting of body parts from mortuaries for the manufacturing of muti. There must be thousands of unidentified bodies going through morgues every year, all wasted and using up valuable land, a luxury we can ill afford.
The idea of the provision fits in well with The ANC plans for the improvement of service delivery. The “witchdoctor on your doorstep” concept will give the poor shack dwellers something they never had before. Add to that suitable social subsidies suggested in the latest budget presented by Trevor Manuel and you have to agree this can only be good for the poorest of the poor. With the commitment and support of Dr Manto Tshabala Msimang and Peggy Nkonyeni who, as we both know, has a special passion for traditional healing and the occult, failure is unthinkable. If this project succeeds it could help the ANC achieve its desire to rule until the second coming. Not only will they have a special relationship with the almighty through Jacob Zuma, they will also have the “Hoofed One” indebted to them. The medical profession, through the upliftment of traditional medical practitioners will aid EE. White doctors will have no patients and will leave in droves leaving an totally black health sector.
There are some less obvious but valuable benefits in this proposal, it will take the focus away from your involvement in industries for their perceived “slave-type” practices. I am of course, referring to your involvement in mining and wine farming. With the less than glorious break-up of Mvelaphanda Resources, people are bound to compare the failure of Mvhela with the Afrikaner empowerment success story of Federale Mynbou. I am sure you would like to put some distance between yourself and that little “fiasco”. With your move back into mainstream politics, this initiative will give you high visibility with the majority of voters. You will be especially admired by the primitive, backward, illiterate and semi-literate segment of the proletariat. Imagine how much power and influence you will have compared to the left wing of the “Broad Church” of the ANC.
I am sure by now you are wondering where I fit into the plan? Well, I am very well aware of the divisions within the ANC Alliance, even after the disappearance of the COPE factor. I am putting the power in your hands to save us from the likes of the SACP and COSATU.
I would not want you to be outflanked by the “Reds” again. I am sure you are not too happy with the way Blade and Vavi outflanked old foxes like Mathews, Cyril and you. I will of course appreciate any recognition for giving you this brilliant idea. I could be coerced to accept job as special advisor on spreading the dough.
I trust you will give my proposal the necessary attention and good luck with the struggle against the Reds.
Yours Faithfully
Yorik Dumfries
Ambushed by Zuma and Prada Pastor Ryperd McCrawley
March 18, 2009 at 12:41 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: Africa Politics, ANC, Commentary, Humour, Jacob Zuma, Politics and Government, South Africa
The recent address, to the congregation of a once “small Church-In-A-Garage” outfit but today a Rand billion business created an outcry. I’m referring of course, to the now infamous visit to the Rhema Church by the Great Jacob Zuma that have raised the ire of many. Many conflicting reports emanated from this great occasion and “S’true’s God” Manga went to interview the Prada Pastor and get the lowdown or ”lie-down” on what really happened, seeing that the Prada Pastor is an honest man and with John Robbie’s interviews generally leaving more questions than answers it was necessary to get to the bottom of this.
We met in an up market restaurant and after ordering our Blue Labels and a bottle of Meerlust, we chose our meals. I was surprised when the good pastor ordered a Kilo T-bone, as a starter. Anyway, we got down to business.
SG.
Did you consult with church council or anybody else before you invited Mr. Zuma to address your church?
RM
As you know I started this church, brought it into this world so to speak, it is in my power to take it out. It exists because of me and will die if I so decide. I do not need permission to extend invitations, sell my property to the church, which by the way was beneficial to the finances of the church, a fact you can check with my dear friend and our treasurer.
SG
Why did you invite Mr. Zuma?
RM (After his second Blue Label and looking redder than earlier)
South Africans do not understand the subtleties of surviving and getting rich in the new South Africa. If you blow smoke up the bums of the power mongers and the ruling elite you will be smiled upon in business and many other aspects of our rainbow society.
SG
Why do you say that?
RM
If the ruling elite are chosen by God himself as proclaimed by “The Great Unwashed”, there can only be benefits for an organisation like ours. It could be like companies in Britain who trade with “Her Majesties” approval. This is only better, after all, Zuma is chosen by God. Can you imagine how much more can we make on Bible sales, DVD and other advertising material if we put a picture of a King Chameleon on the merchandise. We can expect higher margins and a substantial increase in sales to the illiterate segment of the population. The Bible says; “good will come to those who believe”. We see that in the good fortunes of organizations that embraced Mr. Zuma.
SG
Which organisations do you refer to?
RM (swallowing the last quarter of his first glass of Meerlust)
Well the ANC, COSATU, ANCWL and the SACP. For them, things have never been better. Where in the world, in a democracy, have you seen a political party with around one hundred representatives in parliament without anyone ever voting for the party? The kind of thing that only happens in one party states and dictatorships. Here, the SACP have achieved that distinction by supporting a truly powerful man guided by The Almighty himself, as my good friend Ace Magashula will corroborate.
SG
Do you share Ace Magashula’s views that Zuma is the second Messiah?
RM
I have seen or heard nothing to the contrary. I just know that to receive the worship he does, coupled with the way in which he avoids jail, the almighty must have given him divine powers. If not that, he must have made a pact with “the hoofed one” and has acquired powers similar to those of the magician Houdini. We all know stories of pacts between the devil and people like Bill Gates, Robert Johnson and many others, are myths. We also know Houdini was very skilled in the art of “the hand deceiving the eye” but not really a magician. You make up your mind whether you believe in the divinity of Mr. Zuma.
SG
Mr. Zuma referred in his speech that Christianity is a moral guide to the ANC and him. With reports of all sorts of moral dilemmas facing Mr. Zuma, do you subscribe to Mr. Zama’s believes? Do some of the issues not impact negatively on the morality of Christians in general?
RM (wiping his mouth after marking halfway through his T-bone starter)
I’m not sure what you are referring to
SG
An example would be “Malume” sleeping with the daughter of a family friend. Is that the kind of morality that Christians and in particularly you approve off?
RM
There are times when the flesh is weak. Man sees…man desires…girl advertises…man likes…man must have “nookie”. I’ve been there, done that…it is well documented. In the mean time, life goes on and I’m working on my number three. Soon I will catch up with my co-martyr Jacob Zuma.
SG
What about things like fraud, theft, bribery, nepotism, tax evasion, etc.?
RM
I have been accused of fraud and tax evasion. When I sold my property to the church at a nice price. People accused me of fraud and cronyism. Jealous people that cannot manage the system and who does not have the guidance of the Lord will always whine. The Lord points out opportunities to us, the chosen ones, as reward for our good deeds.
SG
Jealous people persecute people like you?
RM (pouring himself the last of the first bottle of wine and motioning for a second)
Yes, people like me and Jacob Zuma and Jesus. People do not always appreciate our closeness to the Almighty and that’s when they dig out dirt and vilify us.
SG
How do you justify your penchant for high living with houses in Ballito and fine dining; and Zuma’ cavalcades of “Black Evil”, I’m of course speaking of the SUV’s, with the humility of Jesus?
RM (Taking the last bite from his starter)
Times are different. The Israelites were a simple people. They were only used to simple things. In Africa today you are respected if you made it, money, flashy cars, mixing with high rollers. That gets you respect. I cannot help agreeing with struggle heroes who said they did not struggle to be poor.
SG
Jesus drove merchants from the temple and said, “This is the house of my father, not a den for Robbers” Didn’t you allow Jacob Zuma to turn your church into a den of robbers?
RM (tucking into his main course of specially imported Langoustines)
Jesus was dogmatic and not always in touch with time. With that attitude Christianity could be driven from Africa and I’ll have to find a different way to earn my humble keep. Mind you, the Muslims can do with some hip in their boring church services. Imagine competing with “The Pilgrimage to Mecca”. We can have a ‘Cape Town Pilgrimage’. Muslims from all over the world can do a walking tour around holy Muslim Sites scattered around the mountain side with the procession being led by bands of “Kaapse Klopse” and half the participants in “Tik-heaven” It will do miracles to our tourist industry. Remind me to mention the idea to Jacob and Kortbroek.
SG
Does it not concern you that you may loose members because of this event?
RM
No, not really. By embracing Jacob Zuma we now have access to the broad-based church of the ANC and the “Zuma-Cult”. We are now discussing the possibility of inviting Julius Malema to become a minister in our church. He did say he will not become a minister in the government for at least ten years, at least he will have a chance of being some sort of minister. Besides his closeness to Mr. Zuma is an added benefit in Mr. Zuma’s close relationship with us here at the Rhema Church.
SG
It was reported that about sixty people left the service because of Zuma, is that true?
RM
I did not count, people often leave.
SG
Does it concern you
RM
No, as I said, we will have members of the ANC and its partners flooding to our church. We will have thousands replacing a few hundred. Our only investment will have to be in sturdier buckets for the thank offering. Coins are a bit heavier than notes you know.
SG
You told John Robbie that Zuma spoke for only a few minutes, yet some of your members claim it was more like thirty minutes.
RM
I did not look at my watch, if I did, I would’ve given them an accurate answer, not many of them have Rolexes you know. Anyway, Jacob’s address was so moving and full off promises of miracles that I was spellbound by him. Added to that his almost hypnotic reptilian features had me in a trance. I heard Jim Morrison’s “Celebrating the Lizard” repeating in my head. So, I may have misjudged the time slightly. I could see Church and State intertwined as in ancient times and I could hear people calling me “Your Eminence”.
SG
Are you planning any other surprise draw cards?
RM (wiping his brow and mouth after the last of his Lango’s)
Unlike some churches, we have not been sleeping and we have Dr. Nzimande planned in the near future.
SG
How do you justify an address by a hardened Stalinist to your congregation?
RM
With the number of senior communists heading for cabinet we will ensure governmental support. Imagine how good we will look if we can convert the communists. We are also planning to invite Zwellithine Vavi. The more members the more money. BRING THE BUCKETS HALLELUJA
We tucked into our desert, deep in thought whilst trying to catch our breaths. What vision!
Open Letter To Nkosasana Zuma
March 9, 2009 at 1:02 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentTags: Africa Politics, ANC, Politics and Government, South Africa, Zimbabwe
Herewith a letter of praise a dear friend sent Nkosazana Dlamini-Zuma. He never received a reply so I thought it might have been intercepted by the NIA. I undertook to put it on my highly visible Blog with the hope that the good Minister can get the accolades she is deservedly entitled to (there is that lovely African word again…entitlement).
January 9, 2009
The Editor The Sunday Times
The Minister of Foreign Affairs,
Private Bag X152,
PRETORIA 0001
Republic of South Africa
Dear Dr. Zuma
Positive Outcomes in the Zimbabwe Situation
I was delighted and greatly relieved when I heard on the news that President Mugabe, with the assistance of your department, Mr. Mbeki and the rest of the negotiation team, is now in the position to form a GNU. I believe most of the success must attributed to you; we all know Mr. Mbeki caused more of an obstruction than help, which is why you are still around, and has been assigned to history. I think it was particularly clever the way you and Mr. Zuma got Mr. Mutambara’s son to marry your daughter thus achieving leverage to convince Mr. Mutambara to work with Mr. Mugabe in a GNU. Rest assured any criticism directed at you and Mr. Zuma for forging family ties out of a desire for political expediency, must be seen for what it is, the green-eyed monster at play. The use of family ties has been a political weapon since the earliest days and I personally, find it noble when servants of the people put themselves second to such noble cause as regional peace. It actually gives perspective to Mr. Zuma’s urgent desire to marry as many wives as possible. One can never have enough family with political clout.
I will however, neglect my duty if I do not caution you against the complacency on the Zimbabwe issue. There are evil forces at work in the region and they will pursue their evil agendas. I refer of course to the enemy. Do not think Morgan Tsangvirai is the problem. President Mugabe could be correct in his assertion that there is forces intent on destabilising the Zimbabwean government in order to re-colonise valuable, resource rich countries and it does not take a clairvoyant or witchdoctor to know whom he was referring to. The rising tide of terrorism is worrying but fortunately Mr. Mugabe’s police managed to arrest Jestina Mukoko and her band of Gordon Brown sponsored terrorists. It is sickening how these terrorists operate. I was reliably informed that one of the woman subversives were taking her two-year old baby with her on sabotage missions as a decoy. I was told by the same source that Mr. Mugabe was very happy with the assistance of our own NIA in unmasking the evil plot. I believe Mr. Bright Mutsonga could not stop praising the NIA. He was of the opinion that without our help the terrorists may have succeeded in their mission. One can now see why the subversives want Tsangvirai to be in charge of the police. It will allow the terrorists free reign. We must never allow Tsangvirai to have that much power in a GNU. I cannot neglect to mention the brilliance of calling the terrorists, “Bandits”. I am sure you must have suggested that. With all your knowledge of cheap Western Propaganda you would have thought of the possibility that they often, when it suits them, will call a terrorist a freedom fighter or vice versa.
You realise of course that their was a lot of criticism against the ANC government for handing the R 300 million aid package to Mr. Mugabe before the required establishment of some prerequisite independent distribution structure. However, I do not think you should be too concerned about that, it is driven by some lily-livered liberal NGO who will tone down their shouting as soon some other cause comes along. Your condemnation of the Israeli aggression has already taken the glare of Zimbabwe, very clever. If they do not go away, just ignore them. We know that Mr. Mugabe, being a fair man, will distribute the aid wisely and where it is needed most. In the mean time, say as little as possible about Zimbabwe and reinforce the positive message of Mr.Mugabe and his nation solving their problems.
I must however, caution you that there are rumblings of discontent over the influx of Zimbabweans into South Africa. I do not understand why they want to come here. With the freedom and good life, they enjoy under Mr. Mugabe and the ZANU – PF government you would think they would never want to leave Zimbabwe. It can only attribute this exodus to intimidation by the British sponsored terrorist campaign. I am sure they operate with impunity and we should perhaps assist Mr. Mugabe in rooting them out. You should consider asking your colleague in SAPS to track down some ex-Koevoet members and “Recces”. They know Zimbabwe and will sort the subversives out in no time.
I want to conclude with my warmest blessing. May you keep up your good work for a long time. Please call on me if you need any assistance in the planning of your foreign policy strategy.
Yours Faithfully
Jorik Dumfries
Jacob Zuma on morality
March 8, 2009 at 8:28 pm | Posted in Africa, ANC, Politics | Leave a commentTags: Africa Politics, ANC, Jacob Zuma, Politics and Government, South Africa
Jacob Zuma said; “It was not defined by “monitoring and evaluating people’s private lives, and by putting forward subjective moral standards against which they must be judged”.
“Our morality also finds expression in the promotion of human dignity through the provision of basic services such as water, sanitation and electricity to our people,” Zuma said. – The Times
Zuma is saying, “As long as I give you water it is OK to commit fraud, supplying water provides me with absolution”
Mbete says, “I supplied you with an appreciation for Africa fashion, therefore it is OK to buy a drivers license and steal from the parliamentary travel scheme”
Winnie Mandela says,” I gave you the necklace and put my Stompie out, therefore it is OK to commit fraud”
The Oxford dictionary defines the word ‘morality’ as
1.principles concerning the difference between right and wrong.
2.Moral behaviour.
3.The extent to which an action is right or wrong.
My mole in Luthuli house tells me he overheard a discussion whilst having a nap in the broom cupboard next to The King Chameleon’s office. Apparently, “The Great One” was saying he was tired of global interpretation of words and concepts forced on Africa.
He told me, Zuma, Mantashe, Malema and Dr. Arts and Culture Jordan are planning a countrywide series of “Book Burning Rallies”. They will burn all existing English Dictionaries and everyone that brings a dictionary to burn will get a copy of “Dr. Jordan’s African English Dictionary”
I had a sneak preview, and there are interesting new definitions for words like; moral, democratic, crony, bribe and many others.
My mole tells me at the rally they will hand out T-shirts depicting Zuma shooting at Oxford and Collins dictionaries with his missing machine gun. They have already asked Zapiro to draw the Zuma image, without the shower.
Africa Disaster Review
March 7, 2009 at 1:00 pm | Posted in Africa, Commentary, Politics | Leave a commentTags: Africa Politics, ANC, Commentary, Corruption, Despots, Jacob Zuma, Politics and Government, South Africa, Zimbabwe
About Activists and Counter Revolutionaries.
A lot of criticism is leveled against leaders, particularly Archbishop Tutu, who is now seen as anti-ANC. Their contribution to the “struggle” is minimized by clowns like Malema who only struggled to catch goats and carve wood.
When Mbeki, Zuma and other exiles were hiding in safe havens the struggle was kept alive and advanced by people like Tutu, Buthelezi, Boesak and other UDF leaders as well as people like Steve Biko, Rampela Mamphela and others. By the time, things were on the roll the “exiles” woke up and jumped on the bandwagon. The revolution nearly ran away from them.
Gwede Mantashe Joining the Nats
Interesting idea Gwede has. I am referring to his suggestion that the ANC applies the Nat policy of Import Substitution.
The ANC are like the NATS…there are many similarities. That is why Marthinus van Schalkwyk, a joke by anybody else’s measure is such a stalwart in the ANC. It is like his natural political home…his roots so to speak. There are so many similarities the ANC are considering declaring PW Botha a struggle hero
It is time the ANC learns that implementing policies does not do magic. They have to take a holistic look at things and use common sense.
Make a plan that fits all the pieces together harmoniously and then implement it with passion, transparency and an open mind.
Leave ideology, rhetoric, populist rah-rah and baggage out of it. The Nat policy of import substitution was not sustainable. It does not lend itself to growth. It is like growing a large tree in a pot, it becomes Bonsai. To get sustainable growth you must be globally competitive. Finland did not derive their economic success from Import Substitution policies; neither did China, India and Malaysia. Mantashe should look there for success stories and not Venezuela.
When SA exports to the USA, the USA importer pays duty. The SA exporter gets his price the SA government gets the duty. We import from the States and we pay no duty to the USA. Benefit goes to SA. Fact is, we should be competitive with car exports and other goods and we are not. Why? Our labour strike at the drop of a hat and we become less competitive by the day.
We make pumps and parts for the mining industry. All materials are sourced locally and the bulk of the pumps are sold locally. The Chinese buy raw material from us, steal patterns, make the parts and pumps and sell it cheaper than locally made product.
Bob won the fight. He “Nkomo’d” Tsangvirai. Fortunately the USA and Europe are not fooled leaving SA to pick up the tab for this monstrosity they call a GNU.
The irony is in the African leaders are slapping each other’s backs, celebrating their “success”
The talking head of the ANC, Gwede Mantashe, said the ANC would appoint two or more Ministers of Education. This is as good as an admission that they did not deliver in the past fourteen years.
I have news for numbskull Mantashe; ten Ministers will not help if the teachers are encouraged to strike at the drop of the hat at the instigation of ANC partners COSATU and NEHAWU.
It will also not help if the scholars and students are encouraged by ANCYL, CYL and COSAS to put political activism, naked anarchy and disrespect ahead of classroom time and education.
No amount of money and ministers will fix the disaster if the students carry on intimidating teachers, burning schools, books and equipment and sub standard teachers strike and stage stay-aways, with the blessing of the said ANC protégés/partners.
Sickly Shabby and Ducking Piggy Balfour
The lack of transparency is overwhelming. Must be really bad, someone (Madam and Eve?) said it is so bad even the medical records are quarantined.
However, looking of some of the definitions thrown around by slimy officials makes it very difficult to determine who qualifies for medical parole. Bob Dylan said; “those not busy being born are busy dying”. Maybe we should just open the prison gates.
Lord Zuma, All Conquering Despot
It is reported that Zuma will want to change the role of State President to give him more power than his predecessors had.
Scary but true, Zuma, in accordance with the next phase of the Mantashe/SACP plan will proceed to convert the role into an all-powerful position similar to Mugabe, Gadaffi, Chavez and the late Nikolae Caesesco.
This opens the door for more cronyism, more corruption and more fraud.
It means he can pull a Shaiky stunt without having to explain.
Selective Morality
The ANC’s Jesse Duarte has described the way its former MP Dennis Bloem moved to Cope as “politically immoral”.
Now that is rich, imagine the ANC commenting on morality. A bit like Satan teaching the Ten Commandments…
Mind you, Jesse looks a bit like the bride of Beelzebub at the best of times.
You can lie, steal, bribe, commit fraud, murder, bribe, cheat on your wife and the ANC will turn a blind eye. The one unforgivable sin is treason against the ANC.
Zille and Malema, birds of a feather
Democratic Alliance leader Helen Zille has challenged the Congress of the People party to say whether it plans to enter into a coalition with the ANC after the April 22 elections.
Zille is to the ANC what Malema is to the opposition parties…their biggest ally.
With all the DA diplomats that are now dancing to the tune of Zuma, Zuma and Mantashe I am more concerned about an ANC/DA alliance than an ANC/COPE alliance.
Methinks I will waste my vote on Patricia seeing Zille will rather fight the small people than the ANC.
Turmoil in South Africa
February 23, 2009 at 9:43 am | Posted in Uncategorized | 3 CommentsTags: Africa Politics, ANC, Humour, Jacob Zuma
Mandela Boosting ANC
It now seems people close to Nelson Mandela are not too happy with the way Jacob Zuma and the ANC used Mandela to distract attraction from the Niehaus scandal.
I am not too surprised, the current crop of ANC leaders have certainly shown they are now scruples when it comes to retaining power. They have already done anything and everything, expedient to hold on to power and there are more to come. The post-event recriminations are a result of the lack of effect the event went passed unnoticed and I will not be surprised if the current hullabaloo is not an attempt to get mileage from a non-event.
One thing I gained from the event is a recurring dream, a nightmare with Mandela and Zuma holding hands and doing the “Machine Gun Shuffle”. In the dream Mantashe and Malema, kneeling in front of the dancing pair, offers with outstretched hands, the legendary long missing AK-47’s draped in green, yellow and black to their Icons.
Malema Heading for Academia.
Now that Julius Malema has established himself as an accomplished Academic, it should be no surprise to learn that he is considering a number of offers from renowned educational institutions.
In the past two weeks Malema:
• Appeared at TUT lecturing on “Work Ethics of Teachers and Students”
• Was involved in a debate with the Minister of Education on the subject: “English Language, Accents and Dialects”.
• Engaged the Minister of Education on “The government’s role in education – The but out and pay-up approach.
• Lectured scholars at the Prudence Secondary School on “The role of the Kindergarten Child in National Politics and the need for activism in Secondary School”
• Lecture in Natal on “Ethics in Politics – The need for Corrupt Leaders”
Because of his newly discovered abilities it is learned, from a reliable source that both TUT and the University of Limpopo are planning to confer honorary degrees on Malema. This rumour was met with a curt “No comment” replies from the institutions mentioned.
Malema was however offered a ticket to Timbuktu by Christian Martin, ANC MEC. It seems the reason for this could be Malema’s desire to make greater international impact as an Africa Academic. What better place than the cradle of African Trade and African History to start his career as an academic. I’m reliably informed he was offered a position as professor of political ethics acrobatics and antics.
Tokyo and the Mvhela (mis) Fortune.
It is with interest that I noted with the demise of one of the first prime examples of BEE. To imagine Mvhela was hailed as the Black “Federale Mynbou”. We all know that Federale Mynbou evolved throughout its illustrious history until it became part of the giant BHP Billiton with its current CEO having his roots firmly in Federale Mynbou roots.
The lesson here is; even if you are assisted by social engineering, you still need savvy and hard work to make it to the top and to stay there. I guess this is where we have to get off and find another comparable example.
My message to Tokyo is, do not rely on Witchdoctors or politicians to keep you at the top. I have a proposition for Tokyo which I will disclose once he has seen it. It is guaranteed to put him on top because it is in his field of expertise. Watch this space.
Jacob Zuma, the Communists and the Conquest of the ANC
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The Sunday Times article about Jacob Zuma’s “closet SACP membership” is particularly insightful.
At the end of last year, a biography was published on Zuma which was perhaps more interesting for what it did not contain. Written by journalist Jeremy Gordin, it fails to mention, for instance, that Zuma was a life-long communist.
Zuma seems to have been anxious not to have this detail widely known. Nor is membership of the SA Communist Party mentioned in Zuma’s government and ANC biographies.
Jeremy Gordin openly admits that he was used by Zuma to white wash him a bit. As a result, some of the darker parts of Zuma’s past are not revealed.
The silence over Zuma’s Communist connection is particularly interesting in view of the demise and near open revolt against Mbeki, under whose leadership the Communists were marginalised. The ascendancy of the Communists in the new ANC has been remarkable since Polokwane. Consider top Communists in ANC leadership and their ascendancy and return to prominence in the ANC:
- Jacob Zuma
- Gwede Mantashe
- Blade Nzimandi (Front man in the Mbeki Revolt)
- Jeff Radebe (The inside man during the Mbeki Years)
- Jeremy Cronin
- Vavi (So closely aligned, he and Nzimandi can’t go to parliament together. One has to watch thing at the office)
The South African Communist Party sees itself as the vanguard of the working class and still supports Marxism/Leninism. It wants to secure working class s medium term vision is “to secure working class rule in all aspects of society, a typical Stalinist approach with the resultant Communist/Stalinist state.
We’ll always have Frank Zappa’s words to fall back to
“Communism can never work because people like to own stuff”
The problem is, by the time the people realise Communism deprives them of their stuff, the damage is done.
Parktown High and Initiation
I can’t help thinking that the our children are becoming a bunch of wimps, sissies and crybabies. Every year parents outrage over initiation practices at schools and Universities are becoming g more vocal and vicious.
We all went through it and I can’t help thinking that black youngsters are lot tougher than the whiteys. Every year thousands of black youngsters have their willies sliced during ritual initiation ceremonies. You hardly ever hear complains from either the initiates or their parents. Once in a while, only if some do-gooder from outside reports it, do we hear of a few mass Willy amputations after the members of some initiates turned gangrenous as a result of inexperience on the part of the “Willy Surgeons”
Obama and the Chimpanzee
I see some people expressed outrage at the comparison of Obama with a Chimpanzee in a cartoon.
Ironic how it becomes such a big issue when a black politician are compared to monkeys or apes. I suggest the mother grundies and the grossly offended complaining go on the internet and search “Bush monkey face” and see enjoy the results. No outrage was ever expressed by anyone. Australian politicians, John Howard, Vaile and Downe have been compared to monkeys. Even the fable “The Wizard of Oz” is said to compare politicians to monkeys.
For the offended Obama fans, I suggest you watch the latest Jon Stewart offering on CNN. That will really get your knickers in knot.
The Kaiser’s New Castle
So Mothlanthe found new digs for him and his young lover.
I wish them happy times and many of those earth shattering parties they have become so famous for. I trust they selected wisely this time, a place with sturdy and well-affixed fittings. The last one was a bit flimsy for a good “African Party”. Tell the kids to cool it with the wild stuff man…the taxpayer cannot carry all these expensive repairs…I mean where are we going to find money for Mugabe’s birthday party and all the hungry Zimbos we are going to have to support.
Our Zuma Options
February 16, 2009 at 8:06 pm | Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a commentOur Zuma Options
In the ongoing Jacob Zuma saga, we are faced by two options, a political solution or a legal solution. Both these option present us with a number of outcomes, each with its consequences. Some consequences may be painful but short term, others may be relatively painless but terminal in the long term.
The Political Solution:
The manner in which, this is achieved, if it allows Zuma to take up the Presidency, it will have the following effects
- Zuma will be happy
- The leadership and most ANC/Alliance members will be satisfied
- Because of known facts from Shaik case, opponents of the idea will always remember it for what it is. Special treatment to some.
- Zuma will remain a typical African despot in the eyes of the world.
- The manner in which the solution is obtained will always be questioned. The firing of Pikoli and the appointment of Mkhize, if it happens will throw a huge shadow over the already tarnished integrity of Zuma and ANC leaders, should it lead to the dropping of charges.
- It will drag the country further and faster down the spiral of corruption, violence, intimidation and corruption.
Should the case proceed along the legal route there are two outcomes, guilty or not guilty. Guilty will result in:
- Joy for Zuma opponents and a lot of “I told you so”
- Rejection of verdict by Zuma supporters
- Anarchy lead by ANC and Zuma supporters (Already threatened by Vavi, Malema and others.
- Things will settle down and the wounds will heal.
A not guilty verdict will result in acceptance of Zuma and the distinct possibility that he can be come a good leader that may remembered by the good things he did. We will be respected and held up as a moral beacon from Africa
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/southafrica/4513300/Jacob-Zuma-trial-delayed-until-after-South-Africa-election.html
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Our New Leader
March 25, 2009 at 10:43 pm | Posted in Africa, ANC, Commentary, Economics, Politics | Leave a commentTags: ANC, Corruption, Humour, Jacob Zuma, South Africa
I believe Hu Jintao will be sworn in as the New President of South Africa.
Mothlanthe will serve as VP and his role will be taken over by Jacob Zuma after the elections. The prosecution of Zuma will be allowed to run its course, if found guilty he will be shot and replaced by Blade Nzimandi. The president elect said he will not allow moral degeneration and he will get rid of corrupt and criminal leaders and officials…the Chinese way. As for Zuma being the Black Jesus, that counts no points with Hu…Cappiche. (or whatever the Chinese term is)
I wonder what NUM will say when China takes over the mines. It will be a bigger blow than the impact they had on the textile industry. NUM may get a few surprises. They often complain about mine safety, their future partners probably have the worst Mine Safety statistics in the world. But then most NUM members do not read international news stories, actually they do not read at all